Excellent Employees, Leaders & Managers Are Excellent Listeners

How does it feel to talk with someone but ― they’re not listening?
There are many characteristics of successful employees, leaders, and managers – excellent listening skills are at the top of the list.
In your next conversation, see how many of these points you can put to use.
     
RESIST
▪ Being distracted by interruptions, computers or telephones.
▪ Being influenced by title, gender, religion, or race.
▪ Applying your attention to anything other than the present moment, that is, one you are talking with.
▪ The urge to gossip or to break a confidence.
▪ Having a closed mind.
▪ Undue influence of protocol and policy. Entertain ideas that may conflict with current standards.
▪ Your compulsion to be right. For the current conversation, release that need.
▪ Prematurely declaring your disagreement or agreement. Watch yourself. Refocus if you notice that you are reacting – one way or another.
     
REINFORCE
▪ Your respect for the other person. The golden rule still works.
▪ Your expressions of high focus, attention, and contemplation through body posture and facial expression.
▪ Your understanding of what you are being told. “I see.” “I understand.” Note how this differs from “I agree.” “Yes.” “No.” “I disagree.”
▪ Your appreciation for their point of view, thoughtfulness, and courage to express their opinion.
     
RESTATE
▪ Rephrase and change the point of view to gain clarity – not antagonism.
▪ Raise thoughtful questions and invitations for the other person to elaborate and place their conclusion in perspective.
▪ Make a long list of points that continue and clarify, like: “As I understand, you mean …” “So, are you suggesting that …” “How do you answer the question of …” “Explain more about …” “How did you arrive at your conclusion?” “How does xxx relate to your conclusion?”
   — Joel Stock
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